I often feel permission to show the depth of my emotion to the Lord when I read Psalms. David was a shepherd boy made king, still working out his identity, his faith, and all his emotions through honest writing. While it presents as poetic or as a song, we know the process of unraveling and falling apart is what got him there. David’s raw and unapologetic honesty towards God gave him permission to not be so put together.
His triumph was not only in the battles he won or the progress his kingdom made. It was his ability to bring his fears, doubts and cares to God and still find himself grounded in hope, and leaving those moments with a renewed mind. His abiding in the Lord didn’t just look like resting. It looked like wrestling with despair, sorrow, and the weight of leading a kingdom. It looked like the Lord’s discipline and love leading him to repentance. David knew being undone in the Lord‘s presence was the most put together he could be – “the Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing” Psalm 23.